Friday, 26 January 2018

Getting it right the second time around

Squidge and Dot on their newborn photoshoots

Regarding children, a friend once said to us "You make all your mistakes with your first", we didn't think much of it and carried on our merry way.

Well, now that we have Dot we really understand what he meant, and more to the point, I feel filled up with guilt that I didn't do better by Squidge. There's so many things I could have and should have done better with Squidge, but I just didn't know.

Early weaning

This pretty much makes me feel sick to my stomach... Squidge was slowly weaned onto solids at 18 weeks, 1.5 - 2 months earlier than recommended. I thought he was ready, and I was impatient. I'd give him a couple spoons of baby rice each day for a couple weeks, then moved on to puree's. I had no idea what I was doing, but I thought it was right, even my health visitor said it was fine to do (and shouldn't have really). I'm not making that mistake this time. I'd mistaken Squidge watching us eat as him being ready to wean and hungry - not the case at all, it's not an indication that they're ready, they're just interested in everything we do, and around that time they become interested in our mouths, so naturally they'll be interested in us eating.

Formula fed

Dot is breastfed exclusively and I'm really proud of that. With Squidge, I always said that he couldn't breastfeed - he'd scream and scream when he went near the breast. But I had no support and no knowledge... if I knew then what I know now, I'm pretty sure I could have made it work. I had no idea about breastfeeding support groups on Facebook - they have been an incredible source of knowledge to me and have helped so much. I wish I could say that Dot hasn't had any formula, but sadly it was his first feed :( Despite telling them that my wish was to breastfeed, after he was born the midwife or healthcare support worker, literally walked in the room and fed him formula - I was overwhelmed by the birth and had a room full of visitors. He then had formula top ups for the first couple weeks until I decided to ditch it and go EBF.

Naps away from me...

When Squidge was a small baby, I was advised to get him to nap in his cot and not the poddle pod, to get him into a routine - at the time he was about 4 months old. I had no idea what was right or wrong so I went ahead and did it. But I've since been informed that babies should have their naps in the same room as their parents until they're at least 6 months old. I seemed so keen to get Squidge through each stage so fast, I didn't stop and think whether what I was doing was actually best for him. This time I'm making sure all day naps with Dot are in the same room as me, and typically on me, gotta drink up all those cuddles while I can :)

What would you do differently second time around?

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